Comparison kills dreams
Apps are great. Facebook groups are great. Online forums are great. There is value is hearing about the successes and mistakes of and frustrations of other brides. It feels good to commune with people going through the same thing as you. There is a kinship there. I get that. But be aware of the pitfalls a s well. Bride to bride support can sometimes only add to the stress.
When a bride crowd-sources ideas for her wedding planning online via Facebook or some other online forum, she doesn’t take in mind that:
- The other Brides who give her ideas may not live in her same area so she may not have access to the suggestions or solutions that the other brides give.
- The prices will be different all over the country.
- Her expectations might be completely different than yours. Her priorities are totally different than yours. Her perfect solution, could be the most disappointing thing for you.
- and she’s asking people who do not plan weddings professionally to give her ideas on what to do about her wedding which can be problematic.
When a bride asks for validation of her ideas in an online forum she’s communicating she’s not confident in herself or her own ideas. A better approach is, “This is my idea. How can I make this work?”
You have to be confident in creating your own vision. Then put the blinders on so you don’t look to the left and right comparing yourself to everyone along the way. If you are having trouble creating a vision for your wedding, consider the vision exercise.